33 Comments Tuesday, January 20th, 2009
10 Worst Celebrity Albums
Forget sex tapes, sometimes a CD is the most embarrassing thing a celebrity can release.
10. The Return of Bruno by Bruce Willis
Remember when the hard-to-kill action hero moonlighted as a blues singer. Know what would give us the blues? A 28-year old doofus marrying our hot ex-wife.
Sample Lyric: “Keep talking about the president / Wont stop air pollution / Put your hand over your mouth / When you cough / That’ll help the solution.”
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9. My World by Ron Artest
After Ron Ron’s angry debut sold only 343 copies its first week, he officially became the NBA’s worst rapper. Shaq is off the hook.
Sample Lyric: “Matt Lauer, up on NBC. You look like a girl don’t talk to me.”
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8. Mojo Priest by Steven Seagal
Think The Glimmer Man is the worst thing Steven Seagal ever attached his name to? Then you haven’t heard this 2006 album. Apologies are in order for this washed up action star-turned-environmentalist. How many trees were destroyed to make his acoustic guitar?
Sample Lyric: “Someone took me to a restaurant and I had to eat something fast / I ordered me some chicken / They gave me alligator ass.”
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7. Wicked Wisdom by Wicked Wisdom
As Jada Koren, front woman of Wicked Wisdom, Will’s wifey, Jada Pinkett Smith, screeches over brutal hardcore metal. Emphasis on the brutal.
Sample Lyric: “You fear me I fear you / We have no idea why that’s true / Except the fact someone told us to.”
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6. How Could It Be by Eddie Murphy
Call this a missed opportunity: A Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate album would have done Jamie Foxx numbers. The only positive to come out of this collaboration between Eddie Murphy and Rick James was a Chappelle’s Show sketch 20 years later.
Sample Lyric: “My girl wants to party all the time. Party all the time. Party all the time.”
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This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 20th, 2009 at 2:20 pm and is filed under Features. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
33 Responses to “10 Worst Celebrity Albums”
01.22.09 at 12:03 pm
John Stamos says:
Oh yeah, you picked some winners! RT
www.privacy-web.us.tc
01.22.09 at 12:19 pm
suze1 says:
could care less about celebs.
they are bottom of the list.
too many more domestic issues to focus on
01.22.09 at 12:54 pm
Kyle says:
Dude you missed the best one! Joe Pesci’s “Vincent Laguardia Gambini Sings for You”. He released it after My Cousin Vinny.
01.22.09 at 12:58 pm
LuLZ says:
FUCKIN LULZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
01.22.09 at 1:02 pm
Darren Tan says:
Some actors and actresses are just born not to be a singer. But they can really act. :-D
01.22.09 at 1:23 pm
Espen says:
The only actor/actress who really actually rocks is Juliette Lewis.
01.22.09 at 1:28 pm
Andrew says:
you missed Brian Austin Greens rap album, Circus
01.22.09 at 1:31 pm
Hat says:
Don’t forget about Guy Lafleur’s “Lafleur”. Nothing in the world is worse than this…
01.22.09 at 1:37 pm
Cole says:
you totally forgot Hulk Hogan’s Album…
01.22.09 at 1:55 pm
luap71 says:
No way, what about William Shatners Albums, even Spock put out one, the Bilbo Baggans song, there is a video, everyone must have been on LSD.
01.22.09 at 1:57 pm
mark says:
Epic FAIL. Where the fuck is Shatner’s album? That should be number 1.
01.22.09 at 2:43 pm
KJ says:
Jada Pinkett Smith’s band Wicked Wisdom is not a ‘brutal hardcore metal’ band, and her lyrics are FAR from ‘brutal’. I think before writing this article the author should have actually done the tiniest bit of research and discovered that Wicked Wisdom is actually a ‘Nu Metal’ band, and the vocals are very typical of singers in that genre.
01.22.09 at 3:03 pm
Brett says:
William Shatner’s first album
Leonard Nimoy’s albums
David Soul’s album
Clint Eastwood’s Rawhide album Hasselhoff (’tho not my cup of tea) is better than any of those works. On the other hand,
Charo is a surprisingly good guitarist.
Shatner has improved considerably, but is still intolerable.
Clint Eastwood is a damn good jazz musician and composer.
01.22.09 at 3:50 pm
Traverse Davies says:
I actually really like Jada Pinkett Smith’s stuff. She’s better than a number of Nu-Metal vocalists. In fact, I plan on downloading some of her music to check out a wider selection. The rest of the albums were crap.
01.22.09 at 4:31 pm
Data says:
How could you leave me out?
01.22.09 at 4:56 pm
Zerocyde says:
What a crap list. Wat is this website’s target audience, 12 year olds? There are plenty of mainstream artists who are FAR worse than anything listed here.
01.22.09 at 5:19 pm
Jason says:
Comming soon. Joaquin Phoenix’s rap album. You can see a clip of him here… http://is.gd/gIb0
01.22.09 at 6:02 pm
chucknbuck says:
the bruce willis lyrics you cite aren’t his, they actually are from a mighty fine Staple Singers song. But moreover, I agree . . . The Return of Bruno. Stinko!
01.22.09 at 7:05 pm
kickars says:
wheres oscar de la hoyas album??
01.22.09 at 8:18 pm
Bladezz says:
I thought Jada’s was a bit good. But, Where is Shaq’s album?
01.22.09 at 8:28 pm
lfytfjl says:
some of them are much better than more successful singers out there…
01.22.09 at 10:49 pm
Rico says:
Kobe? Did we forget that his first single with Tyra Banks was sooo bad that the album never came out? Yeah… it was so bad that the DJ stopped the song mid-play.
01.23.09 at 12:39 am
louistulley says:
What about Rick Moranis’ Solo Album, The Agoraphobic Cowboy?
01.23.09 at 1:29 am
thejackyl says:
I wouldn’t classify Nu metal as “brutal” or “hardcore”…or “metal” for that matter. That was terrible though. I made it like 10 seconds in, tops.
01.25.09 at 1:06 am
jojochicago says:
No Kobe? A.I.? they unreleased. What about Chris Webber? People try to say ShaQ but he’s legit to me. THe man has a classic song with BIG!
01.25.09 at 4:09 am
Big Marv says:
Phillip Michael Thomas (Tubs from Miami Vice!)
01.25.09 at 9:53 am
Erik says:
you totally forgot Hulk Hogan’s Album….
01.25.09 at 11:16 am
Johnny Popcorn says:
What about Don Johnson?(Crocket from Miami Vice)
01.25.09 at 3:15 pm
Jamrock says:
hahaha crazy top 10 i like it. Wicked Wisdom sounds like a wack version of Body Count. Jada, i like you girl, really!! But you ain’t got shit on ice-t XD
01.28.09 at 4:04 am
Linkblog for Jan 17 to Jan 24 @ Unreality Music says:
[…] 10 Worst Celebrity Albums Recoil in horror at some of the worst celebrity albums ever released - including a classic Bruce Willis album. […]
01.28.09 at 4:34 pm
» Blog Archive » The 10 Worst Celebrity Albums Of All Time says:
[…] Could there be a better list?! When you see the albums on the list I’m sure you’ll say, “Oh, yeah, I forgot all about that one. Why did you remind me!” […]
01.30.09 at 6:50 pm
Healthy Guy says:
most of these people aren’t even celebrities but I did laugh at the Steven Seagal and Eddie Murhpy entries lol
02.9.09 at 10:36 am
» Worst Hip Hop Album Covers - KING-mag.com says:
[…] 10 Worst Celebrity Albums10. The Return of Bruno by Bruce Willis Remember when the hard-to-kill action hero moonlighted as […]