1 Comment Monday, February 2nd, 2009
Super Bowl Movie Ads
The only reason I tuned into the game last night was to catch these commercials.
Corny or not, the only reason I tuned into the Super Bowl last night was to catch these much-hyped (at least amongst the Hollywood-focused online community and talking-head-circles) commercials spots. The game itself, surprisingly, turned out to be a good watch as the fourth quarter displayed some of the worst defense this side of O.J. Simpsonâ€™s law team. Yet, still, I left my respective party not reeling from the back-and-forth touchdowns but from the slew of â€œ2009 blockbuster filmâ€ previews.
Just in case you missed any, or want to see them again, here goes (in order from worst to best):
On paper, this comedyâ€”about two nomadic primitives (Jack Black and Michael Cera) trying to find a new home after being banished from their villageâ€”seems promising. You have the reunion of Superbadâ€™s Cera with Christopher â€œMcLovinâ€ Mintz-Plasse and the return of comedy legend Harold Ramis (Ghostbusters, Stripes) behind the camera; reliable Judd Apatow produces it, and it has a limitless high-concept set-up penned by two writers from NBCâ€™s always-hilarious The Office. But this trailer is about as lowbrow, moronic and obvious as it gets. Iâ€™ll wait until the full trailer hits before I write this one off, but itâ€™s not looking good.
Iâ€™ve seen many episodes of the old television series, and I know that there is plenty of campy fun to be had in a Will Ferrell-led update. Especially one that has 2008â€™s breakthrough funnyman Danny McBride (Pineapple Express, Tropic Thunder) cast as his shotgun-driver. Unfortunately, the laughs here are non-existent, and the special effects look garden-variety lame. Worried, much?
Yes, about 10% of the characters here look nothing like those old action figures I used to play with daily, and most of the action stuff seen here looks as expectedly lame and over-the-top as terrible-director Stephen Sommers is known for. Marlon Wayans is here, too, for some reason, and you get hackneyed dialogue exchanges, to boot. This is going to be a huge mess, but Iâ€™d be lying if I didnâ€™t say that this commercial doesnâ€™t have the least bit interested. To be fair, Snake Eyes flipping onto that car is pretty cool, and Sienna Miller is looking delicious in those black outfits as The Baroness. At the most, this one could end up as a guilty pleasure. Brain-rotting candy that I know I shouldnâ€™t indulge in, but just canâ€™t resist.
This whole â€œslightly-better-than-average Joe goes unlocking ancient mysteriesâ€ genre is the pits to me, personally. Those National Treasure movies are garbage, as is, but when you realize just how blatantly they bite off The Da Vinci Code then those Nicolas Cage-starring messes become even more dreadful. The Da Vinci Code itself was a capably made but ultimately overlong and pompous snooze itself, so the thought of a follow-up (which confusingly adapts the bookâ€™s prequel into a sequel, for that matter) isnâ€™t very exciting. Everything Iâ€™ve seen from Angels & Demons, however, has me ready to take pie-to-face, specifically the intriguing â€œsatanicâ€ elements. Now, Iâ€™m excited.
Iâ€™m no die-hard Trekkie (though I can do the Vulcan hand-sign like a professional), so the pretty-and-young cast here donâ€™t piss me off. Nor does the fact that J.J. Abrams (director and mastermind behind this new origin story/film) has gone on the record stating that he himself has never been a huge Star Trek head. So all I have to work with is the luscious Zoe Saldana, â€œHaroldâ€ himself John Cho, Heroesâ€™ badass â€œSylarâ€ (Zachary Quinto), and the aforementioned Abramsâ€”all things Iâ€™m partial to. And this preview looks top-notch. Sign me up, Enterprise team.
Some movies require little more than a hungry imagination and a shutdown brain, and 2007â€™s Transformers is a prime example. Those who hate on it for being â€œmindlessâ€ or â€œpoorly writtenâ€ or whatever other pretentious disses come to mind need to get off their high horses and let loose; it was a movie about giant alien robots duking it out on Earth, and was directed by a perfectly-suited Michael Bay. What the fuck else would you expect? And now we have this first teaser for its follow-up, and holy shit is it awesome! Not only does it seem to be a bit meaner in tone, but we also have what appears to be the Devastator bringing the pain to Optimus Prime, Megatron getting the upper hand on Shia The Beef (a nickname that demands a â€œPauseâ€ surname), and a panther-like robot! Oh, and glimpses of Megan Fox, just to remind us that sheâ€™s back in gorgeous action. Color me psyched.
This entry was posted on Monday, February 2nd, 2009 at 2:57 pm and is filed under Columnists, Theater of Mine. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.